Momentum: The Transformation Journey I Didn't Know I Needed.

In January, I began a transformation journey. That’s not what I thought it would be but that is the most accurate description. In just a few short months, I’ve changed how I see myself and others, gained clarity on what I want in life, and learned what’s possible when you are intentional about life. Funny how God knows exactly what you need at the exact time you need it... even if you don't want it.

Worst Timing Ever.

It was my partner who suggested the “Momentum” workshop. I was skeptical but, as a graduate of the program himself, he assured me I would love it. I thought, January is usually a slow month, why not try something new?

What I didn’t know when I signed up was that this course would time with an Executive Order that would ultimately end my almost two-decade career. My world felt heavy and with layoffs undoubtedly coming at work, I was honestly barely holding it together. This workshop was the last place I wanted to be. But having already paid for it, I showed up, arms folded, sitting in the back row reflecting on how much I really didn’t want to be there.

What I didn’t know, in that moment, was that Momentum was not only exactly what I needed, it would change my life. I arrived in survival mode—I left ready to thrive.

What makes Momentum Different?

When my partner recommended Momentum, I wasn’t sold. He described it as a transformational personal development experience designed for people ready to shed old patterns, deepen their relationships, and step into the fullest version of who they are. But I had been to other ‘personal development’ events (e.g. Tony Robbins, Brendon Burchard) and though they were insightful, they were expensive, time-consuming, and only minimally impactful. But he said, ‘trust me, you’re going to love it’ and so I decided to give it a try.

Completely. Different. Experience.

Momentum isn’t a big conference event with thousands of other people. There’s no charismatic speaker telling you the secrets of life. No step-by-step guidance on how to achieve the life you’ve always wanted. No vendors selling you merch. Rather, Momentum is entirely centered around experiential learning in a small, intimate setting. It’s intentional exercises, coupled with personal and group reflections, all geared towards getting you out of your comfort zone and into a space of transformation.

In short, I'd describe it as an experiential learning program designed to help you reconnect with yourself, uncover your limiting beliefs, and build the tools to live, lead, and love more authentically.

What’s unique about an experiential approach is that, by its nature, it is an extremely personal journey. And that’s what makes it so incredibly transformative. There is no teaching, no answers provided – there is simply what you gain from leaving your comfort zone and exploring your soul.

Uncovering Myself: A Journey Through Momentum

I wasn’t prepared for what I would learn about myself through this experience, but Momentum is like a mirror… a really, uncomfortable mirror.

I remember the first exercise – we had to assess how much we trusted people. “Easy!” I thought to myself, “I trust everyone!” I took great pleasure in telling everyone that I trusted them, happy that I was doing my part to put love into the world. But then we were asked to sit in groups and reflect on why we answered the way we did. As I listened and reflected, I realized that I didn't actually trust everyone--I just didn’t want to hurt anyone. I said what I thought would make people feel comfortable.

As I reflected, the truth was that telling anyone that I didn’t trust them was scary. How would they react? How would they treat me after? How would they feel?

But the instructions of the exercise were to share our authentic feelings. Why did I care to make these total strangers feel so comfortable?

I started to reflect on that question and realized how often in my life truthful expression was met with harsh consequences, even abuse. This need to make others feel comfortable (aka people-pleasing) was a protective measure – one that was in full view in this exercise.

We were asked to reflect on how this showed up in our real lives. That’s when it got uncomfortable. As I reflected, I realized how often I sacrifice my comfort, wellbeing, and even happiness to assure others are comfortable.

Pretty significant realization for the first hour!

What followed was four days of peeling back layers of self-protection… and realizing all the ways those layers were holding me back.

What do I really want in life?

A key value of this experience has been to identify what I want in my life and to build my belief that I have the power to achieve it. Early in the process, I gave the “right” answers to the question of 'what do you want?': health, safety for my son, world peace, etc. But as I drilled deeper, I started to say things that surprised me. Some I hadn’t said in years. Some I had never said at all. But what really struck me was how ‘right’ they felt.

‘I want to be a blogger.’

‘I want to adopt.’

‘I want to have an epic romance.’

‘I want to write a book’.

‘I want to travel to 50 countries’.

‘I want to be me. Not the version of me others want. I want to be the real me.’

I wasn’t just answering a question—it was like I was reclaiming pieces of myself. Dreams that I had long given up or wants that I’ve never felt were available to me.

Most importantly, was the clarity of how deeply I desired to be authentically me.

Honestly, I think it was the first time in my entire life that I had intentionally thought about what ‘I’ wanted. Not what my teachers, coaches, or church leaders wanted. Not what my parents, friends, or partner wanted. Not what my son wanted. What did I actually want?

41 years on this earth and I had never actually sat and thought about my deepest desires. It lit a fire of sorts and oddly made me realize that I mattered. I was more than a mom, a daughter, a partner, a friend. I was a whole, complete person and what I want does matter.

Who Gets to Choose What Life I Have?

A key theme of the workshop was taking accountability for our own choices. Too often we get stuck in the idea of what we think we have to do or should do and forget that we are ultimately accountable for our choices. Every day we choose how we show up. We choose to be bold or to shrink. We choose to be authentic or hide. We choose to change or stay the same. We choose the life we want.

One powerful experience that drove this home for me was centered around articulating a goal or a dream that we wanted, but hadn’t pursued because of limiting beliefs, fears, etc. We were challenged to articulate what was holding us back and face them. I chose practically: a career shift. I laid out all the reasons a career shift wasn’t possible. They were logical and reasonable which made it all the more difficult to overcome them.  

But then I called BS on my own limiting beliefs and embraced the fact that I absolutely could change my career. Doesn’t mean it would be easy – the challenges are very real. But I left that exercise feeling hopeful and empowered and full of belief that I could not just choose but have the life that I wanted.

And that is not a small thing. I walked into Momentum when my world was literally crumbling. My industry was being dismantled with a metaphorical axe and I was both enraged and devastated by it all. I hadn't even had a chance to mourn the loss of the work I loved so deeply and certainly had no confidence that I could just up and change careers. But through this process, I was reminded that I am capable of anything I set my mind to.

What do I want my relationships to be?

A big part of the Momentum experience is reflection on your relationships--professional, romantic, friends, family, and community. We assess where our relationships are currently and where we want them to be in the future.

We were challenged to reach out to someone with whom we wanted to improve our relationship. I chose my parents.

First, some context. At the time of my initial workshop, the Trump Administration was taking intentional steps to end foreign aid. And with that I was facing job loss and the end of my career. More critically though, I was consumed with worry for the millions of people who suddenly and unexpectedly lost life-saving support. I was also deeply worried about the vacuum of influence we were leaving in the world—and who would fill it. To make matters worse, on the news, Republicans were calling us (those who work in foreign aid) thieves, snakes, and accusing us of mass fraud. It was vitriolic but also really disturbing because of how grossly untrue it was.

What does this have to do with my parents? Well as my world was crumbling, I wanted to reach out to them and feel their comfort and love. I was also really angry at them. We’ve disagreed deeply, and sometimes painfully, on politics for years. I don't know who they voted for, but I felt angry at the thought that they potentially had voted for this. That they contributed in any way to the ongoing destruction of my life.

I wasn’t sure how the conversation would go. Honestly, I was genuinely afraid that I might get a Fox News level tongue lashing.

I made the call, unsure of what would result. I was surprised that I was met with not just compassion, but even validation. The connection was needed. The call was healing.

Most importantly, I learned that to have the relationships I want, I must show up and lean in vulnerably and intentionally. Doesn’t mean the response will always be what I want, but the choice to lean in is mine to make.

The Power of Community

A big part of this experience was being in reflection with others. I think there were about 40 of us in the initial workshop and I was shocked by how quickly we all began to open up and share powerful and painful life experiences. The vulnerability shared among these strangers was incredible – we reached a level of vulnerability that I don’t have with people that I’ve known for years.

Two key things I learned from this.

1) Vulnerability in relationships is a choice. It’s not about how long you’ve known each other or how much time you’ve spent together. It is simply a choice to be vulnerable – and when two people choose to be vulnerable, walls break down and authenticity shines.

2) The power of vulnerability to heal.

In one of our group shares, someone vulnerably spoke about sexual assault. Others chimed in. The emotion was raw. What I wasn’t prepared for was when one of the men stood and acknowledged with his own raw emotion, the pain of those who had shared. He noted that it was one thing to know that sexual assault existed, but it was a completely different experience to listen to people talk about it. He acknowledged the pain and the hurt. He spoke with genuine anger that this was reality for far too many women.

As someone who has experienced sexual assault, my eyes filled with tears as I listed to him. In my entire life, I don’t think I have ever heard a man genuinely empathize with the pain of another's sexual assault. I felt seen. And though I hadn’t shared my own experience in that space, I felt heard in a way that I had never experienced before. It proved to be an incredibly powerful moment of healing.

Vulnerability helped heal me in a way I could have never expected. And it happened in a room full of strangers.

It's made me ponder a lot about how different this world would be if we really sat with each other and connected vulnerably. Imagine the healing that could happen.

Where It Began and Where It's Going

This first workshop taught me that I am in control of my life. I get to choose how I show I up every day—in my relationships, in my work, in my personal life. It taught me the importance of dreaming and imbued confidence and belief in the possibility of achieving my dreams.

One of the most important things it taught me was that underneath the fear, the fatigue, the façade—I’m still in here. Wanting. Leading. Loving. And ready to be the undaunted, untethered, and unbroken me.

What about you? Are you holding something too? Something you've never said out loud. Maybe you've gotten so good at surviving, you've forgotten how to feel fully alive. What would it look like to stop bracing and start becoming? What transformation is waiting for you?

For me, this was just the beginning of my transformation journey. I like to say the ‘Momentum’ workshop opened my eyes, but the follow-on workshop, ‘Advanced Living Course’, cracked my soul open. (Check out my next blog to hear more about that!)

Interested in Momentum?

For those interested in the Momentum workshop, here's the info on the upcoming dates in Washington DC and New York City: Momentum Workshop Details — Momentum Education

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